Monday, December 27, 2010

scary. but funny. but really really sad


Figure since I'm so far gone, oceans away
I can lay my saber down today
I miss the words, I love the words you did not say
I miss the kiss you never, never gave away

There goes the sun, oceans away
And days die young when you're gone and you're gone
There goes the sun, oceans away
And leaves the day for someone else

Honestly, I thought that we could make it all the way
Barefoot on beaches, dancing against the gray
But stone by stone, the castle crumbled to the ground
I stood and stared as you started to fall into the waves

There goes the sun, oceans away
And days die young when you're gone and you're gone
There goes the sun, oceans away
And leaves the day for someone else

Here's to the man of your dreams

Take it all in a box
And make my way down to the shore
Throw it in and begin to leave it to the waves

Leave it to the waves
Leave it to the
And leave it to the
And leave it to the waves


do not kiss in hallways. people will whisper and giggle and look at you when you walk by. do not kiss in a movie. old people might look at you like you are doing something wrong- even though they were doing the exact same thing 20 years back. do not kiss at home. mommy and daddy might see. don't kiss at a party. someone might call you a slut. don't kiss ever. kissing is for whores. haha just kidding. who gives a fuck what people think.

word of the dayyy

the pleasure of being able to say to hell with it

teenage romance.

since probably pre school you have liked people. or at least secretly liked people. i know i did. i had boys in my pre school and kindergarten classes that i had crushes on. i'd share my crayons with them and play tag and hold hands with them. boys never had cooties. the worst thing was maybe the boy thought girls had cooties and he'd run away from you. elementary school everyone has that little crush that forms and that never really goes away. but no one goes home crying over a broken heart, maybe only over scraped up knees. middle school rolls around and thats when you really start liking people or getting involved with other people. some hearts get broken some feelings get hurt, but you're young. it's stupid. usually middle school relationships (NORMAL middle school relationships) consist of two people liking each other. the boy asks the girl out. sometimes they are shy and never even talk and end up breaking up and they are sad for a day or they hold hands and say i like you and maybe think a kiss is a quick peck- but are too embarrassed to do it in front of people. why does all hell break lose in high school!?!?! a girl likes a boy but he likes someone else. someone gets cheated on. you date for a year and then its just over and you're left with an empty, broken heart and no friends left because you spent so much time with your "boyfriend" kissing is cool, sex is in. but only sluts have sex, huh? guys pressure you into things and the girls follow willingly sometimes trying to look cool, trying to fit in. pregnancy scares, baby mamas, abortions, fighting, drinking, smoking, heartbreak, tears, making up, breaking up, holding hands, saying i love you, making them your everything. NOW WOULDN'T YOU HAVE A LOT LESS HEARTBREAK IF YOU JUST WAITED UNTIL YOU WEREN'T A HORMONE FILLED TEENAGER!!?!?! MY GOD. stop getting your heart broken. stop falling in love. because it usually wont last. there's maybe a 1% chance it might. so just have fun and save that for later
FACT OF THE DAY: Most of the laugh tracks you hear on television were recorded in the 1950s, which means a lot of the people you hear laughing are dead.

working on some writing

so i found this redoubled sonnet i had for my poetry class at OCHSA that i never edited and stuff and i was working on it the other day. don't ask what a redoubled sonnet is it would take an hour to explain but i was writing about this guy and addiction and it was basically the story of his addiction and stuff but i figured i'd give you guys the first sonnet in the set of 15. no i am not a drug addict. no i am not emo. no i do not cut myself. no this is not about me. it is just a sonnet. hahaha :)the set is called disappointment. maybe when i'm through with the whole thing i'll post it.

Sonnet #1

cigarette smoke floating in the cool night air,
i'm consumed by this addiction that haunts me.
all senses are dulled, foresight is impaired
people don't see everything i could be.
i've got no where to go, nothing to live for.
i'm lost in this wasteland, trapped behind fences,
like being in a room that has no door,
the whispers continue, my body tenses.
my head keeps on aching, two worlds collide.
voices in my head turn back the pages.
i've got no where to go, nowhere to hide,
i just keep living my life in stages. 
but i don't want to see the scars on my wrists,
i go on pretending they don't exist.

He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
haha this made me laugh. i just had to share. if any guy said ride me Pocahontas while we were having sex he would either have to be A) really really really drunk B) we would have to be dressed up like indians or something roleplaying or some shit c) i could have to be wearing a feather head dress d) or he must just be really really freakin weird.

yayyy the hot water is back

so i got my new water heater today!!! FINALLY! i am so excited you have no idea. having no hot water for a week is living hell. like no joke. no hot showers. no washing the dishes. no washing your hands in non freezing water. etc etc etc. you get the idea. you don't realize how much you take advantage of that on a daily basis but i am so happy to have it back. i didn't realize what a luxury it actually was but my god.. i was dying without it.