i cant sleep because you're not here any more. there's nothing left to dream. only nightmares.

i love you

hold me in your arms and don't let go. kiss me long and slow. pick me up into your arms and spin in circles. dance with me under the stars. make me laugh. i like to see you smiling back at me. whisper in my ear. tell me that you love me. tell me that you need me. tell me that you never want me to go. be my lover. be my best friend. lets walk away into the sunset holding hands. you are my everything you are the light that brightens the dark. and i never want to lose you.

people are strange

people are strange when you're a stranger

faces look ugly when you're alone

women seem wicked when you're unwanted

streets are uneven when you're down

when you're strange

faces come out of the rain

when you're strange

no one remembers your name

when you're strange 

when you're strange

when you're strange

people are strange when you're a stranger

faces look ugly when you're alone

women seem wicked when you're unwanted

streets are uneven when you're down

when you're strange

faces come out of the rain

when you're strange

no one remembers your name

when you're strange 

when you're strange

when you're strange

when you're strange

faces come out of the rain

when you're strange

no one remembers your name

when you're strange 

when you're strange

when you're strange

word of the day

basorexia

an overwhelming desire to kiss or neck

let the world know you as you are, as you think you should be. because sooner or later if you are posing you will forget the pose and then where are you??

think about what you really want. not what people want for you.

i dont wanna get up at 5:30 to go to school tomorrow. that is a fricken joke. and what teacher assigns homework over break anyways??? 

someone bring me chinese food!

chinese food sounds soooo good right now like you have no idea. i am craving it. that and salsa. i want that right now. but i cant have it. blahh someone bring me chinese food! doesn't that sound so yummy? sitting at a tepan grill watching them cook fried rice and hearing the sizzling of the meat cooking on the grill. the soy sauce and dumplings. can you tell that i really want chinese? 

i'll say what i wanna say

i enjoy having the power to do what i want. it sets me free. i'm so tired of following what "society" wants me to do. something isn't "appropriate" or it shocks people. maybe those people need to be shocked a little bit more. i like being able to say what i want to say and i don't think i'm going to give that up any time soon. i'm sorry if that hurts your feelings- but it's just my opinion... no one else's. the might share it with me. but i'm just speaking my mind.

awwwww

this kid is adorable. don't you agree? i mean seriously. i am so against dressing kids up in little outfits but in this case, i'm okay with it. because he is ADORABLE ahhhhhhh so cute

breakfast

i really want raspberries and warm orange cinnamon rolls right now

miss being a kid

sometimes i wanna be a little girl again. i miss it you know? everything was so much easier to deal with when i was little. i felt free. you had short days at school. you got to color. you had recess you got to play dress up and wear moms heels and pretend to be a princess.you could play barbies and have fun with a cardboard box. we made forts. we played tag. we ate goldfish on the black top and thoughts gushers were the best. i have been alive for 15 years. and instead of getting older i want to be 5 again.

and for just a moment.. i felt like i was on top of the world

i was just thinking

so i was just thinking that me and you were good together. and maybe we should give it a chance. let fate run its course? you know? lets have a little fun lets see the world lets dream and run until our luck runs out and then i guess it will be the end. but maybe there won't be an end. maybe we will run away into the never setting sun. but i was just thinking.. thinking of impossibilities.

when you're dreaming with a broken heart, the waking up is the hardest part.

all you do is judge me. you take and take and take. but what do you give back? absolutely nothing. why am i wasting my time with you people? what are you giving back to me? because i am starting to question where i am and where i've been and what is real and what is fake. you tell lies through your teeth with that plastic smile on your face. i gave you everything but you never gave anything back. so i am done wasting my time. say what you want about me. but you are all wrong and i am going to be laughing when i prove you all wrong.

Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche

good example

cinderella stayed up till midnight at parties. sleeping beauty got to sleep forever. aladdin was a thief. snow white lived with seven men. and goldilocks broke into a house and ate the bears food. and our parents wondered how we "turned bad"

can it be summer now??

what i am thankful for in 2010

i had a friend ask me to make a list of the top 50 things i was thankful for in 2010. so here it goes!!!

1)my family. i take advantage of you guys i do things that i shouldn't do. say things i shouldn't say. but you guys are always by my side no matter what.

2) "slow dancing in a burning room" by john mayer. somehow this song got me through 2010. 

3) OCHSA. the school is crazy. no... it is insane. and i love it to death and miss it dearly. everyone there taught me so much. I learned a lot about myself, i learned about the way people work, that it is okay to be different, that you don't have to fit a stereo type, not to stereotype- so what if someone is gay or they like to dress up and change their names so they are the same as movie characters so what if a guy wants to be a fashion designer or do ballet. it is okay. it is okay to be who you truly want to be and not hide behind a mask. thats what OCHSA taught me. i have amazing friends there and i didnt really give it a chance at first but i regret that.

4) my notebook. it taught me how i think and gave me a numb feeling nothing else could give me. 

5)starbucks. i would have died. thank you for the caffeine at 6 AM.

6)my camera. i love being able to capture a moment in time in a photograph. 

7) chocolate covered strawberries. so yummy

8)the bus rides to OCHSA every morning and coming home from school. good writing material

9) my babiessss at Shea i don't get to see Jaidyn and Lauren any more because i'm not working there but those two little girls changed my life. not even joking. just seeing them smile made me appreciate so much.

10) mojo. i love my pupppyy he gets me through everything. i feel like i neglect him. and i kinda do. but he is my baby and i love him

11) my scrapbook- it reminds me of where i've been

12) jacuzzi nights with my girls. i miss them so much and i don't get to see them very often any more but they are my sisters and they always will be

13) USC. for sort of motivating me to study

14) rachel. for being my best friend. you are my rock.

15) breaks. i would die without weekend and breaks like summer and thanksgiving break. i'm not joking.

16) all the stupid people who constantly entertain me.

17) google. for making it so easy for me to find everything i need to find

18)Jen. for making me cakes and hugging me when i want to cry. i love you bitchhh you are amazing and you have such a good heart. i'm lucky i met you this year

19) sticky notes. i would forget everything without them

20)my fuzzy leopard slippers that i wear constantly now. i am in love with them

21) this blog. i can waste so much time on this thing which is not good but i love having the freedom to say what i want to say

22) emily s. for participating in fat tuesdays with me and jen and for all the talks we have. (by the way you and chase are adorable)

23)my ugg boots. that i wear every single day.

24) TAO. it is amazing. restaurant/ bar / club in vegas if you haven't been. go. now

25)the nights were you drive around blasting loud music and singing and dancing in the car. they are priceless 

26) victorias secret. i love that place. it is so fun hahaha

27) boys boys boys. you drive me crazy but you constantly entertain. thank you for thinking of every stupid thing to possibly do.

28)the park. it lets me get away for about an hour and relax and write and get my thoughts together.

29) fat tuesdays. one day a week where i don't feel bad eating 5,000 calories

30) fruit snacks. they are yummy enough said.

31) raquel. for being my other half.

32) the stars. i love them

33) national parks. i love being in the middle of nowhere.

34)you. for reading this and caring what i have to say.

35)loud music. i love a beat

36) guys sweatshirts. i am obsessed. they are 1000x better than girls sweatshirts. just saying. they are just better

37) rainy days. it gives me an excuse to lay in bed and cuddle all day

38) the chiropractor. for making it so i can walk without being in pain.

39) my boyssss for always having my back and for watching out for me. i love you guys

40)baseball games. i love them i grew up with them i miss them

41)ANGL for constantly supplying me with cute dresses

42)acrylics and red and black nail polish. you make my nails look pretty and that makes me happy

43) cookies. they are fun to make and it relaxes me to make them. idk why but they relieve stress.

44) baths. thank you for making me calm the f*@$ down.

45) books. you inspire me to write

46) holding my hand- i missed that a lot.

47) giving me nights that i will never forget. i couldn't if i tried.

48) spontaneous moments where we burst into song. it makes me smile

49) competition. it keeps things interesting.

50) life. for moving on.

thank you for being my new years kiss

from a while ago

i was going through old pictures and i found this little photo shoot i did at the park with sammi. it was a lot of fun. i love it down there (where we were taking pictures) it was fun. this was one of my favorites. just thought i would share

the famous- miami ink

shoes shoes shoes

i have a problem. i am a compulsive shopper. and i have a shoe collection started. these are a few of the pairs i have. then a whole column thing on the side and the inside corner of my closet. i just love shoes!!! SUE ME

i wish there was an undo button that you could click every time you made a mistake. wouldn't it make life so much easier?? you wouldn't have to deal with as many fights. as much drama. tears. betrayal. accidents. how many times have you said, "it was a mistake" or "i didn't mean to" i bet more than a few times. but then again you learn from your mistakes and they help you remember what to do and what do do. 

HAPPY FREAKIN NEW YEAR!!!!

woooohooooo is the end of the decade!!! happy 2011 everyone hope you all had a good night last night and were safe. no drinking and driving i hope. hope you still have confetti in your hair and that you had a wonderful night. good way to kick off 2011 <3

this year i decided that my new years resolution is to not make a new years resolution. because it always gets broken in the first 2 days. i mean really. things like: i am going to stay out of trouble i am going to go to the gym i am going to get straight A's i am going to be nicer i am not going to do this i am not going to do that i am going to lose 25 pounds and be a size 2 again blah blah blah blah blahhhh. who ever really accomplishes it?? i mean seriously. it just disappoints people really. so my new years resolution is to not make any more new years resolutions :)

I never gave you a reason to hate me.

You’re just creating your own little drama of pure insecurity

i wonder how many people wake up tomorrow looking like shit wondering where they are. i'm positive that i am not going to be one of them. have a safe night people!! no drinking and driving <3

for a guy you really are a little  bitch. i mean seriously. you whine about being cold and how hungry you are and that your jeans don't fit right. you whine about how long it takes to go places and ask 1000 times why we're doing something. seriously! STOP! it is so annoying- you are a girl.

and some castles made out of sand will melt into the sea eventually

California: According to Urban Dictionary

California:

1. state that produces more good than anywhere else, has crazy night life, large school, hot women, a load of stuff to do, and the longest beach anyone has ever seen

2. extremely diverse

3. much more entertaining than texas

949:

the area code for south orange county, one of the richest places in the country. also, its a huge bubble and life outside it is "gay" (btw i love here so i have the right to make fun of it)

i live in the 949 and i love listening to music about pain such as my chemical romance and watching shows for 12 year old girls such as the OC.

United States:

If you don't like it, go live in Canada mother fuckers.

Cali:

the name that non-native californian's use when referring to California and trying to seem like a real Californian.

Typical of an East Coaster

Hey, duuuudddess let's go to the shore in Cali, and thrash some waves.

Complicated Starbucks Orders

i'm a starbucks junkie. everyone knows that. its bad. like i seriously have a problem. Venti skinny cinnamon dolce lattes. zebra mochas with a peppermint shot. passion fruit iced tea with raspberry sweetener. toffee mocha frappachinos. you get the idea. its funny when i go in there in the morning and the person behind the counter says "good morning kaitlyn, what would you like today?" and i turn around and look at the guy in the suit behind me whos face is like oh my god are you kidding me? before ordering. but what is the most complicated starbucks order?

"Yes hi I'll have a tall half-skinny half-1 percent extra hot split quad shot (two shots decaf, two shots regular) latte with whip."

"Double Ristretto Venti Nonfat Organic Chocolate Brownie Frappuccino Extra Hot with Foam and Whipped Cream Upside Down Double Blended."

"Triple Grande 140 degree no foam cinnamon dolce latte with caramel on the whip."

who can come up with the most complicated starbucks order???? maybe you'll win a prize if you come up with a really good one ;)

the talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.

i love having to stand on my tippy toes to kiss you

i want chipotle right now!!!!!!

33 things to do while home alone

1) dance in your underwear

2) sing along to the newest Katy Perry or Justing Beiber song... oh i know its a guilty pleasure of yours

3)take a bath and fill it with lots of bubbles

4) watch the TV show or movie that is your favorite but can't watch because it drives everyone crazy and its always on

5)tan outside without a bathing suit on- you won't have tan lines hehe just make sure your neighbors aren't creepin

6) sing along to an opera and pretend that you are really good

7) do those funny exercise videos in front of the TV the ones about how to do chair dances and sexy yoga are hilarious by the way

8) make your own youtube video- parodies are hilarious. so pick a song and make fun of it or something!!

9) go mattress surfing down your stairs

10) sit in front of your computer and take 100 pictures of yourself until you think you look pretty in one

11) read a magazine that you love but would be too embarrassed to read around anyone else

12) clean out your closet!

13)have a TV marathon and lay in bed all day

14) cook something out of a cook book instead of microwaving. make some fancy dish and enjoy it afterwards

15)make a scrapbook- bet you can't remember all the things that happened in the pictures. try and remember so you have it when you are old

16) read blogs they are a complete waste of time and can be funny

17) impersonate people from the movies you are watching

18) skip around the house singing show tunes and dancing with your dog or something have fun with it!

19)walk around naked.. hey if you're into that kinda thing now is your time because you can't normally do that... i think

20)make cookies then proceed to eat them all. yum yum yum

21)take a quiz and see who you truly are- GOOD way to waste time

22)hey... here's one! READ A BOOK!!!

23) make a playlist of music that makes you happy

24) give yourself a mental health day and get all pretty- do your nails, do your hair, relaxxxx

25) clean something. its a good way to waste time and you are being productive

26) exercise and blast music

27) facebook creep on people and refresh your news feed every 2 seconds

28) prank phone call someone

29) lay out on a raft in the pool, sleep, read a magazine, relax, listen to some music

30) have an art project make something pretttyyyyyy

31) play farmville or something

32) play barbies or legos dont you miss being a kid?

33) see how big of a bubble you can blow with your bubble gum

look outside at all the pretty people walking by

best friends

 we hold hands. we tell each other everything. we are constantly together. we share dressing rooms. bathrooms. beds. we ask for advice. hold each other when we cry we kiss each other.we kiss each other just because we can because we are like sisters. we do crazy things. we dance in our underwear. we have "dates" and go do fun things. we act like we love each other. and thats because we do. we are best friends. we might look like lesbians to you but shes my brother from another motherr, my sister <3

cutest thing i've seen in my life